YOU DO NOT HAVE A CHOICE!

I am going to be straightforward with you and cut through the bullshit.

You DO NOT HAVE A CHOICE!
You DO NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING!

As Jesus’ words on the cross “Forgive them for they know not what they do.”

Here is the exercise for you:

Answer these questions:

Do you know what you are doing?
Do you know why you are doing what you are doing?
Are you aware of your actions?
Are you present to the things you are doing at every given moment?
Are you aware of the words that are coming out of your mouth? Or they are just coming out based on a reaction that was triggered by something?

You are stuck! Do you ever find yourself dating the “same” woman over and over again? Do you find yourself in the “same” situations over and over again? Do you find yourself repeating the “same” mistakes over and over again?

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”
~Albert Einstein

You are living in an illusion!
Wake the fuck up!

See I know that choose is a nice word and we all want to have choose. If you think you have choice will you keep on choosing dysfunctional relationships or any other negative situation in your life? Choice can only happen if you are present and conscious in the moment. Choice implies a high degree of consciousness. Without it you have no choice. Choice begins the moment you disidentify from your conditioned patterns, the moment you become present. That goes to say that you are unconscious. Which means that you are compelled to think, feel, and act in certain ways according to your patterns and conditioning. Some think that the more you have in the world in form of money, intelligence, resources and so on the more choose you have. I want to make it very clear that how smart, intelligent, good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you are does not have anything to do with how present you are. All these things are wonderful, but they become a problem when you start identifying yourself with them. The more you identify yourself with this external stuff the less presence you have and the more unconscious you are.

You know that voice in your head? That voice is your biggest obstacle to being present. Why do you think people go out to bars, clubs and parties and drink themselves to unconsciousness? May be people do that not because they want to become unconscious but simple because they want to become conscious. They want to make that voice in their head shut the fuck up for a moment and just let them be, although they are not aware that this is one of the biggest reasons why they are drinking so much (you can easily replace drinking with drugs). That voice in your head has a life of its own. That voice in your head is controlling you, it is telling you what to do and is tiring as fuck to listen to it all day long. Most people are at the mercy of that voice; they are possessed by it, by the mind. And since the mind is conditioned by the past, you are then forced to reenact the past over and over again. The voice in your head (that you think is you) is conditioned by your past so it always seeks to re-create what it knows and is familiar with. Even if it is painful, at least it is familiar. It always attaches to what it knows. The unknown is dangerous because it has no control over it.

Is there any resistance anywhere in you to what I am saying? Are you (your mind) totally confused by what I am saying? Are you ready to defend yourself and prove me wrong? Let me save you some time. Yes, I am totally and completely wrong and you are totally and completely right…

Take a moment and breath in everything that just happened. If you have to - go back, and read it again, and take it in, and notice where it is landing.

~

Someone, not sure who, has said:
“The harder the battle, the sweeter the victory.”

Well how does it feel in your body to have nothing to fight against? Or do you keep on fighting? Or may be you just scratched me off, judging and thinking that I am simply crazy and you cannot argue with a crazy person? Does the voice in your head telling you that I am wrong? Does that voice feel threatened in any way? Well again you are totally right and yes, I am completely crazy…

Are you confused yet?

See we all have created patterns and ways of being that have served us greatly at some point or another in our lives. If you still have resentment for your parents about something that they have done or have not done, thinking that they had the choice, you are still identifying yourself with those patterns. And unfortunately for us all those patterns have taken over us. They have been taking over, with us not even being aware of it. As a result of that we are acting most of the time from that place without us even knowing about it or even being aware of it. We do not have a choice any more. Our life is being run by it.

It seems like we, our parents, our intimate partners, or our friends have a choice, but that is an illusion. Nobody chooses dysfunction, conflict, and pain. They happen because there is not enough presence. You have not quite woken up yet. In the mean time, the voice in your head and the conditioned patterns of your mind are running your life.

So go back to where I said that you do not have a choice and that you are living in an illusion and just for a moment check the idea that I might be right. I am not saying that I am, I am simply asking you to just try on the idea, the concept that I might be right. Wear it on like you are trying a new shirt and see how it feels on your body and how you look with it.

So what I would like you to do is:

Sit down and write down every place you find patterns in your life. May be you always end up with the same kind of woman? May be you keep on doing the same mistake over and over again? May be you are finding yourself in the same kind of problems over and over again? Also simply look if you are thinking over and over about the same things. Since we are here to learn about women look for your patterns with women. But it does not really matter. I think in “Land Mark” is that they say, “the way you do anything is the way you do everything”.

Very important:
Do not judge it in anyway. Whether is bad or good - it does not matter. Who are you to determine good from bad? What is good anyway? What is bad? It simply is!

The reason I want you to do this is:
The only way to change a behavior, pattern is to bring awareness to it, to simply notice it and see it there.

Or another thing you r can do is:

Come to one of the many workshops I have across the country and I would be your tour guide caring a flashlight that I will shine it into the darkness. I use the world darkness simply because if you are not aware of something, and you do not know of it, you are on the dark about it. The awareness we can bring to it in a workshop environment is the light that shines, and no darkness can exist in the presence of light.

It will not disappear but you will have a choice around it. You still might want to choose to act from that place but it is no longer controlling you now, you have the choice to keep acting from that place or not.

“The eye with which I see God is the very same eye with which God sees me”
~Meister Eckhart

Email me or call me at:
415.531.2487 to get info for a workshop coming up close to you

Love and Light on your way
~Hristiyan

Words - he said, she said...

Woman is the devil!

Nice and slowly. Beauty is a destructive angel. How could anything that looks so good be so bad? In the end, she gets them all. They think they can handle her…

Woman is an angel!

Her beauty brings tears to my eyes...
Her divine feminine opens me to God...

Which one is it?

Hmm hold on now, no one in my life has hurt me more then women have, no one have fucked me up more then women. Well of course they are the devil!

Hmm hold on again but no one has giving me as much pleasure and light as women have. OK then they are Angels.

But my life is so peaceful, calm happy and quite when there are no women in it, and it is wild, chaotic and crazy when I have a woman next to me.

But even in some religions woman is look at as the devil for she is the temptation for lust and desire. I think Adam and Eve fucked it all up for us.

But some ancient cultures respected the feminine greatly. Lau Tzu refers to the feminine as the mother of all things and that we all come from the mother and we all return to her. He says, “The Tao is called the Great Mother”

I am getting so confuse my head is spinning I cannot make up my own mind. What do you think? Are women Evil or Angels? I cannot tell anymore. I must be in my feminine right now, or something. Hold on, give me a minute, let me take few deep breathes… Oh I think I got it. I tell you what it is: It is words themselves. I tell you words are a tricky thing. Words are one-sided! Everything that can be thought in thoughts and expressed in words is one-side, only a half. All such things lack wholeness, fullness and unity. But the world itself, existence all around us and within us, is never one-sided. Never a woman (or man) is entirely wholly evil or wholly angel; never is a person entirely holy or sinful. That only appears to be the case because of the illusion that time is real. That is why great teachers like Buddha or Jesus always have to speak of good and bad, deception and truth, suffering and liberation and so on. As this example of the words of Lau Tzu:

When people see something as beautiful.
other things become ugly.
When people see something as good,
other things become bad.

Being and non-being create each other,
Difficult and easy support each other.
Long and short define each other.
High and low depend on each other.
Before and after follow each other.

There for the Master
acts without doing anything
and teaches without saying anything.
Things arise and she lets them come;
things disappear and she let them go.
She has but does not possess,
acts but does not expect.
When her work is done, she forgets it.
That is why it last forever.
~Lau Tzu
~Tao Te Ching

And yet so far in this post alone I have use over over 400 words. I want you to look at the words and use them as signs pointing you to that pure state of being, the place of original magic. I am not even here I am just guiding you, not teaching you. I will use words to guide us all to go deeper and deeper. I want you to simply observe how different words trigger you and what is your attachment to them. Some words will trigger bad emotions and some will trigger good emotions. All this emotion triggering is happening unconsciously. Those emotions are trigger from the definition that you have to the words. You have no control of those emotions because you are not conscious of your mind. Unconscious assumptions crate emotions in the body, which in turns generate instant reactions. Do your best not to react without being conscious to your reactions. Try your best to observe what reaction is coming up. For example if I tell you that “you are a fucking genius and a handsome mother fucker” or that “you are worthless peace of shit not worth living”. What is happening as you are reading this? Does the first one making you feel really good, may be make you smile a bit, or may be you are having a hard time letting that in? What about the second one? Are you ready to defend yourself and prove me that I am wrong or may be you were feeling down and now you found some comfort in those words thinking something like “see I knew it even he says it.”?

How funny are we people ah? These are just words why do we put so much attachment to them? Anyway just pay attention to your own reaction. The story that is coming up to your head as you are reading the words that I use or say in Podcast or videos. Be like: “hmm there it is this emotion is coming up again I am wanting to defend myself right now.” Or “oops I missed it I just reacted without being aware.” Or anything of that nature. It is quite entertaining when you start observing yourself, so now you can never be bored. You can laugh into tears when you start seeing all the crazy shit you are doing without you even knowing that you are doing it. And the good news is that the act of observing is an act of the self and not of the mind. So the very act of observation is bringing you into presence and not only into presence but into a conscious presence.

For now lets go back to exploring words. Another funny thing about words is that we all have different attachment to words. But somehow and for some weird reason that is not clear to me yet, we assume that the attachment and the meaning that we put to a word is the same one that everyone else puts.

That is why the words of Jesus for example have been interpreted in millions of different ways for the last 2000 years. Every one interprets them the way they find fit for them. Whether there are used for good or bad intentions. Here some more words about that from Meister Eckhart: “Indeed, I tell you the truth, any object you have on your mind, however good, will be a barrier between you and the inmost truth.” He goes on by saying “The just man loves God for nothing…” Of course the same can be said about Buddha, Lau Tzu and everyone else.

I very much hope that you are not here looking for some new theory or some new idea that you can put into use. Matter of fact I am trying to help you get rid of them all. They just get on your way of relating. As I said already everything that can be thought in thoughts and be said in words is one-sided. Every theory out there has to it a totally contrary one to it that is equally true. Some part of the people identify with one and some with the other. See theories and ideas are mind made things, ego made things. The more you are identifying yourself with certain idea or theory the more you are identifying yourself with the ego and less with your essence of your pure being, presence. So please try your very best not to attach yourself to words and the meaning that you (your ego) has put to them. Please, as I said, use the words I give you for guidance, use them like signs. Like a sign that says left or right and you follow them and see where they take you. Listen to the underling field of stillness from out of which the words come, there is a field of stillness that is both within and without. Gaps between the words, a silent space in between the words and simply be aware of that dimension.

Deeper teaching is not and through the words. The deeper teaching lays in the dimension of stillness.
~Eckhart Tolle

Forget everything that you have ever learned about relating or intimacy. Become as a newborn baby as he/she has no ego or attachment to form and has zero problems relating to anyone or anything.

To make this fun lets explore the meaning of the word love for example.
First of all what is the meaning of love for you?
I live in San Francisco with all the new age hippies (just right here did anyone felt offended by the words “new age hippies” or did anyone laugh and thought, “yes I know those”. Are you identifying yourself in someway with those words?) they all use the word love all the time. I also know of people that have used it once or never in his/her lifetime and I am sure the attachment and the value they put to it is a lot different.

Do a bit of research, go to few different dictionaries and find out what they have to say about “the L-word”:

For the Ego love is possessive and addictive clinging that can turn into hate within a sec.

Here is what the bible had to say:

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

- Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Last but not least remember to have fun with words just like Mike Myers did in the “The Love Guru”. Like for him Intimacy is “Into-Me-I-See”

Or

Nowhere is “Now-Here” come on that is creative, funny and very true, simply genius.

Or this one is really funny exploring what Bible stands for:
B - asic
I - nstruction
B - efore
L - eaving
E - arth

Seriously now please DO NOT ever take yourself too seriously.

Here try this exercise for a day and have fun with it:

First of all give the definition of these words (down below) that you have for them. Then find two-three women, I do not care if you know them or not friends, strangers or family and ask what is the definition that they give to these words. Then find out two-three men and ask them what is the definition of these words for them.

We started with “love” so lets find out more definitions of that word.
Love _____________________________________
Intimacy __________________________________
Relationship _______________________________
Happiness _________________________________
Fear ______________________________________
Ego ______________________________________
Good _____________________________________
Bad ______________________________________
Evil ______________________________________

Do, as many words as you can you do not have to do all of them. Feel free to find the meaning of words that you are curious to find the meaning of.

The Tao does not take sides:
It gives birth to both good and evil.
The Master does not take sides;
he welcomes both saints and sinners.

Have You Ever Lost Your Power As a Man In a Relationship?

Have you ever felt like you are on top of the world? Having your life together going places meeting a beautiful woman falling in love and few months into the relationship you end up feeling small, insecure and needy?

Ask yourself if you or anyone you know has or had both of this: loving, passionate, steamy hot, relationship and also is living life from the depths of his integrity as a man fully living his purpose and mission in life?

Are you ready to have both? Well if you are call me and come to my workshop!

How can a man be as productive, as powerful, as focused, as grounded, as solid, in the midst of a passionate relationship as he can be when he has no women in his life?

When we do not have a feminine partner next to us, I notice that we put all our energy and focus on either enjoying the simple beauty of life, the little moments. Or we put all our energy and focus on giving our gifts to the world.

I personally know men that purposely stay away from women because they see them as a distraction from where they are headed in life. After all it takes a lot of energy to maintain a healthy relationship doesn’t it? And lets be totally honest with each other women are pain in the ass!

To make it even more complicated women are way more attracted to us when we are so clear and focused on our mission in life. As we experience ourselves being clear, solid, focused and women attracted to us soon we find ourselves in a relationship with most likely a phenomenal woman.

As soon as we experience some depth of intimacy with this phenomenal woman, we begin to feel weaker as a man. We start to lose clarity, focus, and solidness. As a result of that our phenomenal woman experiences less attraction towards us. As a result of her being less attracted we start to feel even less focused, clear and solid. Not only that but pretty soon we become needy. Somehow from being on top of the world having our shit together giving our gifts, hooking up with a phenomenal woman to finding ourselves in a vicious circle feeling insecure, uncertain, and needy.

What happened along the way?
Shouldn’t things now be even better then before, after all now we have a phenomenal woman next to us to support us and encourage us to be better men in the world?

How can we stay with our hearth fully open to the world and our woman, while we maintain strong solid power with which we can penetrate the world and our woman right open?

Have you ever noticed that for us men we can do one or the other but not both at the same time?

It is easy to penetrate our women strongly and powerfully at the beginning of a relationship because our heart is not been fully open to her yet. As the relationship deepens our hearts open bigger to her and the more open our heart is the less powerful as a man we feel. It is like we are fully disconnected from our power when we are around our woman.

Maybe even at times when you are out in the world away from your woman you experience some sense of power and in the back of your mind you are think “God I wish she was here to see this”. Unfortunately not only that she wasn’t there to see it but also the moment you see her you completely lose it again. The moment you see her your heart simply blooms open and you instantly get disconnected from your power.

What would it be to be able to fully love her, heart wide open, and violently f*cking her all at the same time. Your love so big that it actually hurts of how much you love her, and yet you are taking her, penetrating her deeper then she has ever been before. Open heart and a hard cock.

Friend of mine the other day told me “as soon as she became sacred to me I was not able to spit at her” and I thought to myself “well I do not think that she would like you to spit on her if you do not see her as sacred.”

How can a man have both at the same time?

Samurais and Native Americans practice this. The practice to kill your opponent with love. To hunt with love. To f*ck with love. As Deida likes to say “murder her open to God with your f*ck”

Where can you start your practice?

Well like with every practice first start to pay attention to when you are feeling your power and when you are not. Start to feel when your heart is wide open and if you are feeling love whether is towards a flower, nature or a woman and notice if you can feel your power as a man in that moment. Become present to how you lose your power as your heart opens. Become present to how your heart closes as you are in your power.

From the place of being aware of those changes you can start to have a bit more choice around it.

Take full responsibility for creating your life. Be accountable for what you are creating. Know that there is not such a thing as the perfect woman. Know that if you are power is not rotted in love no matter with what woman you are with you will lose your power when your heart opens and as a result she will lose attraction to you as man. If you are in your power but you are not loving her she will also get turned off by you, your power will disgust her.

Once you can feel your heart fully open and maintaining your power as man and you can walk down the street maintaining both you will have to power to do something about any woman that you desire.

I have only one question for you:
ARE YOU READY TO HAVE THAT?

If you are keep reading if not you can stop right here.

Call me at 415.531.2487 and sign up for my workshop.

In it, you will get:

• the very core basic foundation from which to interact with a woman so she is turn on by you
• secret technique to create instant trust with a woman
• simple eye contact method to have woman melting in your arms
• how to touch a woman in way which she can feel your sexual power
• how to speak to a woman so she can get what you are saying
• how to avoid getting stuck or blocked in any stage of your relationship

Contact me at 415.531.2487 for more info.